Thursday, 16 June 2011

THE EVOLUTION OF THE SPECIES

From THE DAILY RECORD:

Driven mad by an itchy wart, a man decided to remove it himself – and shot off most of the middle finger of his left hand. Sean Murphy used a 12-bore Beretta after creams failed to cure the problem.

But his shotgun surgery landed him in court where, yesterday, he received a 16-week sentence suspended for 18 months for possessing an illegal firearm.

Sean of Doncaster, South Yorks, said: “I’m happy with that. The best thing is the wart has gone. It was giving me a lot of trouble."

COMMENT: Anyone looking for an explanation for this man's actions should concentrate on just one word and enlightenment will come to them. The word is DONCASTER.
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8 comments:

  1. I have a large wart on the sole of my right foot. Anyone got a luger they don't want?

    I don't believe the wv ... dedlycod

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  2. What about the large hairy wart on the head of the Church of England?

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  3. That, I'm afraid, would be murder, Renz and the sentence, if you got caught, would be a lot more than an 18 month suspended sentence.

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  4. Oh, I was just trying to figure out how we could have it easily removed...my apologies. ;-)

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  5. I believe the most effective treatment is burning it out with a laser. But again, I foresee possible uncomfortable legal consequences to such an action.

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  6. If only it were enough to pry its fingers off the crozier and lock it out of the palace...

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  7. Poor, silly man, but I have to admit, the "comment" part did make me laugh out loud!

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  8. Is Doncaster analogous to (what's said of) South Carolina: "Too small to be a country, too big to be an insane asylum"?

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