Of Course, I Could Be Wrong...

LOUD FRIDAY

2012-01-27T18:28:00.003Z

Now this is good. The group is called The Bandoliers, and their debut album, from which these tracks are taken, is entitled "Prove Yourself." It's all brand new but very much connected in spirit to the classic rock of the early seventies. The musicians are a talented bunch and the singer can, well, sing. He has a voice that reminds me of Paul Rogers. It doesn't have that strangulated, screechy quality that became popular with hard rock singers in the late seventies and early eighties. I'm not a massive fan of heavy rock but this I like a lot.

BAND'S WEBSITE (Free download available)

PURCHASE VIA MADPRIEST'S AMAZON STORE

NEW WORDS FOR HOLY COMMUNIONOFFICIAL LAUNCH

2012-01-27T11:30:00.003Z

HERE IT IS!

My new project.

A monthly, downloadable resource providing prayers, intercessions, acclamations, biddings and blessings for use in the eucharistic services of the church.

Each issue will contain material for every Sunday and every principal feast during the month.

All the material is strongly linked to the gospel reading of the day based on the Common Lectionary. It is a truly international and ecumenical resource but it also provides extra material for national peculiarities such as Mothering Sunday in England.

I have tried to reflect, in a modern way, the words and meter of our traditional prayer books. I have also made sure that the new words will fit seamlessly into all orders of service so that congregations will not be confused or worried about changes and innovation.

For a sample copy of the material for the
Annunciation of Our Lord to the Blessed Virgin Mary

CLICK HERE

Please feel free to print it and use it. It's already formatted for A4 paper in nice large print so even oldies with poor eyesight, like me, can read it easily in church.

The cost of each monthly issue is only £2.49 (just less than $4.00 U.S.). It is available by monthly subscription but you can cancel your subscription at any time - there is no minimum subscription period. Payment is via PayPal but you do not need a PayPal account of your own to subscribe. Subscribers will be sent each new issue approximately one month before the month covered.

So, for the first issue of NEW WORDS FOR HOLY COMMUNION by Jonathan Hagger (that's me) which covers the month of March 2012 just click on the subscription button below and follow the instructions. Your copy for the month will then be sent direct to you by email.

I NEED YOUR HELP!!!

I am self promoting this project to begin with and so I need as much publicity for it as possible. Please help me by advertising this new venture on your blogs and recommending it all over the social network sites you belong to. Also, download the sample, print it out and shove it under the nose of anybody you know who is responsible for eucharistic worship in their churches, asking them to consider a subscription.

I would love to be able to finance my online ministry myself and I am hoping and praying that this new project will help me achieve this goal.

PAUL(A)'S BEAUTY TIP FOR TODAY

2012-01-26T23:53:00.000Z

Fotoshop by Adobé from Jesse Rosten on Vimeo.

UGANDAN GAY HERO REMEMBERED

2012-01-26T15:57:00.000Z

From NEWS24:

Ugandan gay rights activists braved hostility and stigma Thursday as they gathered to commemorate the first anniversary of the murder of their fellow campaigner David Kato.

"We are here to celebrate and thank God for our beloved friend and human rights activist David Kato," former Anglican bishop and gay rights campaigner Christopher Senyonjo told a crowd of around 100 activists and family members.

Gay rights activists speaking at the event called Kato, 46 at the time of his death, "the godfather" of the Ugandan gay movement and said that his passing had left a large void in the life of the country's gay community.

"He always looked out for all of us even at times when we thought it was too difficult," Frank Mugisha, director of SMUG, said at the function in central Kampala.

Kato's family members at the event spoke of the support that they had received from campaigners both in Uganda and the international community following his death

"It is not easy when a loved one dies but thanks to all the friends inside and outside Uganda who worked with David ... when I get down they lift me up and help me," said Nalongo Kisule, Kato's mother.

COMMENT: So, please, no talk of going it alone. As you can see from this article it is incredibly important that we view our fight for justice as a world war, not a local skirmish. The haters do just that and there would be nothing they would like better than the good guys leaving them to it in Africa and Asia. And if we let them dictate the agenda there will be hangings. We know that. They have shown the world that is exactly what they want to happen.

THERE'S A BETTER HOME A-WAITING IN THE SKY

2012-01-26T14:55:00.000Z

JOHNNY OTIS

Singer, composer, arranger,
producer, vibraphonist
and percussionist

Godfather of Rhythm and Blues

December 28, 1921
- January 17, 2012

SYL JOHNSON

Singer, guitarist,
harmonica player

July 1, 1936 -
January 17, 2012

WALTER GAINES

Singer

Died 17th. January 2012

LARRY BUTLER

Keyboardist, singer,
songwriter and producer

March 26, 1942 -
January 20, 2012

WINSTON RILEY

Singer and producer

1946 - January 19, 2012

TERRY DOLAN

Singer and guitarist

1943 - January 15, 2012

AL URBAN

Singer and guitarist

March 1, 1935 -
January 18, 2012

JOHN LEVY

Double-bassist

April 11, 1912 -
January 20, 2012

HENRY DAVIS

Bassist, flautist,
keyboardist and singer

Died January 18, 2012

ERROL SCORCHER

Singer and Deejay

1956 - January 19, 2012

LEROY TAYLOR

Bassist

December 19, 1944 -
January 17, 2012

Willie And The Hand Jive - Johnny Otis
Different Strokes - Syl Johnson
The Bells - Originals (Walter Gaines)
Everyday I Have To Cry - The Gentrys (Larry Butler)
You Don't Care - Techniques (Winston Riley)
Ain't Livin' Long Like This - Terry And The Pirates (Terry Dolan)
Lookin' For Money - Al Urban
September In The Rain - George Shearing Quintet (John Levy)
Back In Love Again - L.T.D. (Henry Davis)
Roach In A De Corner - Errol Scorcher
K-Jee - Nite-Liters (Leroy Taylor)
Ain't Nothin' Shakin' - Johnny Otis
Double Barrel (written by Winston Riley) - Dave And Ansil Collins
Is It Because I'm Black - Syl Johnson

DON'T BLAME MADPRIEST, BLAME THAT VERY NAUGHTY VICAR FROM SUFFOLK'S BROTHER

2012-01-26T10:46:00.000Z

On his 74th birthday, a man got a gift certificate from his wife. The certificate paid for a visit to a medicine man living on a nearby reservation who was rumoured to have a wonderful cure for erectile dysfunction. After being persuaded, he drove to the reservation, handed his certificate to the medicine man and wondered what he was in for. The old man handed a potion to him, and with a grip on his shoulder, he warned, "This is a powerful medicine. You take only a teaspoonful and then say '1-2-3.' When you do, you will become more potent than you have ever been in your life and you can perform as long as you want."

The man was encouraged. As he walked away, he turned and asked, "How do I stop the medicine from working?"

"Your partner must say '1-2-3-4,'" he responded, "but when she does, the medicine will not work again until the next full moon."

He was very eager to see if it worked so he went home, showered, shaved, took a spoonful of the medicine and then invited his wife to join him in the bedroom. When she came in, he took off his clothes and said, "1-2-3!"

Immediately, he was the manliest of men. His wife was excited and began throwing off her clothes and then she asked “What was the 1-2-3 for?”

And that, boys and girls, is why we should never end our sentences with a preposition, because we could end up with a dangling participle.

BLESSED ASSURANCE PASTORNICKED FOR SOLICITING

2012-01-26T10:32:00.000Z

From TAMPA BAY ONLINE:

Polk County Sheriff's Office vice detectives arrested four men, including a pastor and a retired Canadian police officer, during an undercover operation today at Peace River Park in the Homeland area. Detectives said after they made contact with the men, the suspects exposed themselves and/or asked them to perform sex acts on them.

Among those arrested was Matthew Preston Clark, 33, of Bartow, who told detectives he is senior pastor at the Blessed Assurance Temple, 1245 S. McAdoo Ave, Bartow. He was charged with soliciting a lewd act.

Always first with the news, OCICBW... has managed to track down a video of young Matt Clark in the very act of making lewd suggestions to his congregation in the middle of a Sunday morning service. The man is incorrigible.

TO THE MANOR BORN

2012-01-26T10:00:00.000Z

From THE WASHINGTON POST:

Sounds like the right man for the job.

SAYING POO TO A MOOSE

2012-01-26T09:09:00.001Z

From THE LOCAL (Norway):

With train drivers exasperated at running over so many of the helpless beasts, the National Rail Administration (Jernbaneverket) is looking at ways to slash the number of animal collisions on the country’s rail network. Noting that elk dislike human scents, a lecturer at Hedmark University College has put forward a pungent solution.

“Open the toilet tanks on the stretches most frequented by elk and let human urine and excrement scare the elk away,” he told newspaper Østlendingen.

From 2000 to 2009, a 20-kilometre stretch between Koppang and Reda saw the railroad deaths of 288 elk, or moose as the animals are known in North America.

COLD ENOUGH TO FREEZE YOUR NIPS OFF

2012-01-26T09:00:00.000Z

From THE LOCAL (Norway):

With the annual topless tobogganing world championships just two months away, the competition’s Norwegian organisers believe it’s time for the sport to get its own national arena.

“Ski jumpers have Holmenkollen and track and field athletes have Bislett. Our hill facilities should be the national arena for naked tobogganists,” championship architect Sten Hansen told national broadcaster NRK.

Hansen, the self-styled “topless general”, expects the number of participants and spectators to set new records when the tobogganists disrobe for this year’s competition on March 17th. For the first time, the competition will include categories for the fastest women and men, as well as a special mention for the best winter body.

COMMENT: Best winter body?! At last! A competition I stand some chance of winning.

OCICBW... readers wanting to enter this year's contest should, in the first instance, send their application forms through to me along with a photograph clearly showing their credentials. I will then pass them on to Sten. Honest.

GOD KILLS 77 NORWEGIANS

2012-01-26T08:48:00.000Z

At an open meeting organised last week by the local branch of the Christian Democrats in Sarpsborg, south-eastern Norway, the writer, Per Haakonsen, claimed that last July's massacre of seventy seven children at Utøya was God's punishment for Norway's poor diplomatic relationship with Israel. He further suggested that an oil rig disaster in 1980 was due to God getting cross because Norway was refusing to sell oil to Israel.

You see, my American friends, your country doesn't have a monopoly on hate-filled nutters spouting nonsense.

HIGHLY RECOMMENDED

2012-01-26T08:08:00.000Z

Check out the post, "Andrew’s journey through church discipline at Mars Hill," at BENE DICTION BLOGS ON. It's all about what happens when you encourage one man's sexual pathology (in this case the man is Mark Driscoll) to dominate (forgive the pun) a church community. Personally, I can see very little difference between attending Driscoll's pseudo-church and visitting a dominatrix, other than the fact that the dominatrix would be more fun and less expensive.

THE RETURN OF WHERE DOES HE FIND THEM?

2012-01-25T23:39:00.001Z

I am so, so sorry.

WORSHIP AT ST. LAIKA'S

2012-01-25T13:34:00.000Z

HOLY COMMUNION

WEDNESDAY

25TH. JANUARY 2012

THE CONVERSION

OF PAUL

All are welcome to join me in taking communion.
There are no exceptions.

The order of service is posted beneath the audio file so that you can join in with the service. The words in bold type are the ones we say together.

If you want to physically partake of communion you will require a small piece of bread and a small amount of drink (preferably made from grapes and containing alcohol). How you view the nature of this part of the service is completely up to you.

Click on the arrow on the player to stream.

Download via the MP3 icon below the player.

Download podcast via iTUNES

MP3 File

ON THE FEAST DAY OFTHE CONVERSION OF PAUL

2012-01-25T13:24:00.002Z

CAREY INSISTS POOR SHOULD PAYFOR THE MISTAKES OF THE RICH

2012-01-25T08:08:00.000Z

The former Archbishop of Canterbury, George Carey, attacked the bishops in the House of Lords yesterday for spearheading the derailment of the governments attempt to reduce welfare spending. Basically, he insisted that such reform was necessary if the UK is to reduce its national deficit.

Well, it certainly is one way of tackling the problem but it hardly seems fair and it certainly isn't Christian.

Times are tough in Blighty at the moment and your average citizen is coping with their reduced circumstances by buying less luxuries. Instead they are using their incomes to provide the necessities of life for their families and for themselves. This is eminently sensible and what people always do when money is short.

Surely then, this is what we should be doing as a nation. In other words, we should not be affecting anybody's ability to provide themselves with the necessities of life but should be paying off the deficit out of the nation's disposable income. To put it even more simply, we should be taxing the disposable income of the rich and not loading further financial burdens onto the already poor.

However, having said that, I do believe that something needs to be done about our welfare system as it encourages poor people to make long term mistakes, detrimental to society at large, for short term benefit. For example, if you are poor and have no foreseeable opportunities to get out of poverty, then, with our welfare system as it is at the moment, it is a good idea to have as many children as possible and avoid paid employment at all costs. By doing this you will be helped to find accommodation which will be paid for by the welfare services and given money for each child you have. For young people this is especially attractive as we basically ignore the problems poor, young, single people face financially and, even more so, their housing problems. Nobody is going to get rich exploiting the welfare system in this way but you can remove yourself from absolute destitution.

People like Carey think that we should force people into being more procreatively responsible by removing the carrot and thumping them with the stick. Maybe this would work but, again, it is hardly fair. We just end up making a miserable situation even more miserable for millions of people.

Any reduction in welfare provision must be accompanied by real opportunity to earn a decent wage. It is my belief that the best way out of recession is to take money from those with disposable income and use it to create real jobs that will benefit society in the long term. For example, the infrastructures of the UK are in a pitiful state. We have one of the worst transport systems in the world and we have virtually no manufacturing industry whatsoever. If I was in charge I would immediately instigate a massive programme of railway construction. I would prepare the country for the effects of climate change by investing in the water industry. I would follow Germany's lead in actively promoting renewable energy. Not only would such schemes provide employment in the short term it would also mean that when the current crisis is over the UK would have a firm basis from which to compete economically with the rest of Europe, maybe even the rest of the world.

A successful, healthy nation is one body. At the moment in the UK we are cutting off limbs left, right and centre in an attempt to protect the affluent head. But what use is a head without the rest of the body? The only way to cure the ills of the nation is to treat the illness holistically. Piecemeal reform will just make matters worse and burdening the poor with more misery will not only make matters worse it will also make matters extremely dangerous indeed.

TRACIE THE RED'S LOL DOG OF THE DAY

2012-01-23T20:06:00.002Z

MORE HYPOCRISY FROM THE HOUSE OF BISHOPS

2012-01-23T20:02:00.002Z

There's a huge ding-dong going on in the House of Lords at the moment with the bishops of the Church of England leading a campaign to get the government to back down on their proposal to put a cap of about £26000 a year on welfare pay outs to individual families. The tory responsible for squeezing the poor is Ian Duncan Smith who has well and truly put the crocodile crying bishops in their place by reminding them that they only pay their clergy about £22000 per year and expect them to work six days, sixty plus hours a week to earn that pittance. Only bishops, deans and archdeacons earn more than £26000 per year (plus expenses). Of course, the real culprits are the penny pinching, well off laity of the Church of England who will still put less in the collection plate on a Sunday morning than they pay for their Sunday Telegraph or Observer.

WORSHIP AT ST. LAIKA'S

2012-01-22T14:06:00.000Z

HOLY

COMMUNION

22ND. JANUARY 2012

THE THIRD SUNDAY

OF EPIPHANY

All are welcome to join me in taking communion.
There are no exceptions.

The order of service is posted beneath the audio file so that you can join in with the service. The words in bold type are the ones we say together.

Click on the arrow on the player to stream.

Download via the MP3 icon below the player.

Download podcast via iTUNES

MP3 File

DON'T BLAME MADPRIEST,BLAME THE AWFUL ANCHORITE

2012-01-21T18:50:00.000Z

A husband and wife are on the 9th green when suddenly she collapses from a heart attack! "Help me dear," she groans to her husband.

The husband calls 911 on his cell phone, talks for a few minutes, picks up his putter, and lines up his putt. His wife raises her head off the green and stares at him.

"I'm dying here and you're putting?"

"Don't worry dear," says the husband calmly, "they found a doctor on the second hole and he's coming to help you.

"Well, how long will it take for him to get here?" she asks feebly.

"No time at all," says her husband. "Everybody's already agreed to let him play through."

THERE'S A BETTER HOME A-WAITING IN THE SKY

2012-01-21T14:40:00.000Z

ETTA JAMES

Blues, rhythm and blues,
rock and roll, soul,
gospel and jazz singer

January 25, 1938
– January 20, 2012

JIMMY CASTOR

Singer and saxophonist
Doo-Wop, Soul and Funk

June 23, 1940 –
January 16, 2012

The Wallflower (Roll With Me Henry) - Etta James And The Peaches
Seven Day Fool - Etta James
I Promise - Jimmy Castor And The Juniors
A Sunday Kind Of Love - Etta James
I Just Want To Make Love To You - Etta James
Block Party - Jimmy Castor
Just You Girl - Jimmy Castor
Sookie Sookie - Etta James
Out On The Street Again - Etta James
Hey, Leroy, Your Mama's Callin' You - Jimmy Castor Bunch
Bad - Jimmy Castor Bunch
Mama Told Me - Etta James
Do Right Woman Do Right Man - Etta James
Troglodyte (Cave Man) - Jimmy Castor Bunch
I'd Rather Go Blind - Etta James
My Brightest Day - Jimmy Castor Bunch
At Last - Etta James

DAVE ALEXANDER
a.k.a. Omar Sharriff,
Omar Hakim Khayam and
Omar The Magnificent

Blues singer
and pianist

March 10, 1938 –
January 8, 2012

SKITTLE'S TOON OF THE DAY

2012-01-20T14:11:00.002Z

TRACIE THE RED'S LOL DOG OF THE DAY

2012-01-20T14:06:00.002Z

LOUD FRIDAY

2012-01-20T13:50:00.000Z

Here's some first rate, loud, anarchic punk from Gallic rockers, Louis Lingg And The Bombs.

I apologise for the unacceptable language during parts of this recording. There's nothing I can do about it. I keep telling them not to but the French will insist on speaking French :-)

BAND'S WEBSITE

IF IT WASN'T FOR ALAN TURING...

2012-01-20T11:31:00.002Z

Human beings say some downright silly things at times. Near the top of any list of often repeated twaddle I would place the phrase, "One person cannot change the world." Not only is this obviously incorrect it is the exact opposite of the truth. All change begins with one person doing or saying something and sometimes that one person's action is so unique and influential that it would be highly unlikely that the change in question would ever happen without that one person.

Alan Turing was a genius. In fact, he was probably the greatest English genius since Isaac Newton. During his tragically short life he was primarily responsible for five major achievements. He invented digital computing. He cracked the Nazi's Naval Enigma Code. He started people thinking about the possibility of artificial intelligence which in turn led to new thinking in neuroscience. He introduced mathematics into evolutionary theory and got a British government to apologise for the way British society and its legal system at the time persecuted and killed him just because he was gay.

In 1952 Alan naively reported a burglary to the police. An aspect of his particular genius was that he was incapable of telling a lie or even dissembling the truth. So, he matter of factly told the police that he was living with a nineteen year man and that they had enjoyed mutual masturbation together on a small number of occasions. The police immediately forgot about the burglary and prosecuted Alan for gross indecency. At his trial where, of course, Alan pleaded guilty, he was offered the choice of imprisonment or chemical castration. He chose the latter option. This meant that he had to take estrogen tablets everyday and this led to the feminisation of his body, the shrivelling of his testicles so that his body no longer produced testosterone, impotency and, worst of all from Alan's point of view, he lost his mental ability to concentrate. He had been promised that when he stopped taking the pills that his body would revert back to how it was before he started taking them. His body didn't. On the seventh of June, 1954, Alan committed suicide, probably by eating an apple laced with cyanide, at the age of forty one.

We tend to regard hate crimes as a personal thing, concerning only the individual victim, his or her immediate family and close friends. It is only in extreme cases of organised bigotry, such as the various Nazi genocides, that we see a much bigger picture. But all hate crimes effect the whole of the society in which they take place and can often be internationally relevant. This is because any violent act effects, and in the case of murder, completely precludes, the victim's future potential. In the case of Alan Turing I suggest that his suicide (institutional murder) had a devastating effect on the potential for British science, industry and national wealth.

Let's play a game of "What if?"

What if Alan Turing had committed suicide before World War II?

I think it is very unlikely that anybody would have broken the Enigma Code before it was too late. Not only would this have meant that the British people would have slowly starved and not had the resources to defend themselves against invasion, it would also have, most likely, meant that the D-Day Landings would not have been possible. What this would have meant for the people of the world, especially Europeans, is something that is terrifying to contemplate. It is also very likely that I would not be here typing this blog post.

So, we can reasonably predict various potential outcomes if Alan had taken his own life fifteen years before he actually did. Therefore, we can also, reasonably predict various potential outcomes if Alan had not taken his own life in 1954. I think it is reasonable to posit that if Alan had lived to a ripe old age, computers, as we know them today, would have been invented far earlier, that Manchester University would have become the "Silicon Valley" of the world and that Britain would be the locus of new technology development and a heck of a lot richer and more influential than it now is.

In other words, one minor act of institutional homophobia, at a time when such acts were commonplace, possibly ended up effecting the lives of millions of people in an adverse way as well as removing the possibility of goodness knows what as far as the collective knowledge of the human race is concerned.

Homophobia not only kills individual people
- it kills the future for us all.

THE MIDNIGHT JUKEBOX

2012-01-19T22:40:00.000Z

Five of the grooviest, coolest, most soulful jazz tracks ever tonight.

Cantaloupe Island - Herbie Hancock
Moanin’ - Art Blakey And The Jazz Messengers
I Wish I Knew How It Would Feel To Be Free - Billy Taylor
So What - Miles Davis
The Sidewinder - Lee Morgan

I'm wondering, was the drumming gorilla in the Dairy Milk advert based on Art Blakey? Their style of playing and their mannerisms whilst playing are very similar.

WORSHIP AT ST. LAIKA'S

2012-01-19T16:16:00.000Z

A SERVICE
OF COMPLINE

THURSDAY
19TH. JANUARY 2012

THE FEAST OF
ST. WULFSTAN

The order of service is posted beneath the audio file so that you can join in with the service. The words in bold type are the ones we say together.

Click on the arrow on the player to stream.

Download via the MP3 icon below the player.

Download podcast via iTUNES.

MP3 File

JESUS WAS A REPUBLICAN

2012-01-19T10:02:00.000Z

I've always believed that Jesus was a socialist. But I've now decided that he may well have been a free market capitalist.

Jesus was a Jew living in Palestine. All his original workers were local labour. Yet as soon as his company started to take off he closed down the Jerusalem operation and moved his head office to Italy.

That's blatant outsourcing. Heck, Jesus probably invented the vile practice.

SEATTLE BISHOPS SCUPPER ANTI-GAY ARGUMENT

2012-01-18T14:49:00.001Z

From THE ADVOCATE:

In a letter published late Friday on the Seattle archdiocese’s website, Washington State’s four Catholic bishops call on members of the faith to contact lawmakers and urge them to “defend the current definition of marriage.”

The bishops say that only heterosexual marriage should be legally recognized because it is “related to bringing children into the world and the continuation of the human race.” There are “forces already undermining family life today,” and recognizing other unions would exacerbate the situation, they write. They also say that limiting marriage to straight couples “does not depend on anyone’s religious beliefs” and that this definition of marriage “is grounded not in faith, but in reason and the experience of society.”

COMMENT: Bloody 'ell! If the Roman Catholics are going to start resorting to reason and citing experience they are going to bugger themselves as far as same sex marriage is concerned. In fact, they could end up with no Roman Catholic Church whatsoever. I mean, if you get rid of the unreasonable stuff from Roman Catholicism what have you got left? Christianity, I guess, but their present leadership don't seem too keen on that.

QUOTE OF THE DAY

2012-01-18T14:38:00.001Z

“Don’t take care, take risks and make sure that the church is totally and utterly relevant. The reason I became a clergyman was because I was too bored sitting in the pews. There are so many churches that aren’t full of life.” (Canon Andrew White, Baghdad)

From CHRISTIAN TODAY.

QUIETLY DOES IT

2012-01-18T13:13:00.001Z

From VIRTUEONLINE:

On February 19, 2012, former Roman Catholics, Bishop Oscar Rojas Quinto and three of his clergy will be received as priests into the Anglican Church of Peru, along with their congregations from Huancayo in the mountains of central Peru. Bishop Harold William Godfrey, who heads the Diocese of Peru, called it a "reverse Ordinariate."

As a community of former Roman Catholics, they have suffered from persecution and prejudice. They have been accused of being "false priests"; their services have been broken up and legal action threatened. "These are brave men and women who have endured much for the sake of the Gospel. It is an honor to count them a part of the Anglican family," said the Rev. Ian Montgomery, Canon to the Ordinary.

Bishop Oscar, while becoming an Anglican priest, will still be honored as a bishop, albeit without the ability to confirm or ordain. He will still be ecclesiastically involved in overseeing his congregations in the Huancayo region.

COMMENT: I don't understand that last bit. Surely a bishop is a bishop. In England, our suffragan, assistant and retired bishops don't have the same authority as a diocesan bishop but they can, most certainly, ordain and confirm. If they didn't then our diocesan bishops would have to work for a living.

Other than that, well done Anglican Communion. If there is one thing that the mother church has bequeathed to the rest of the Communion it's reserve and the ability not to crow too much when we win. Unlike a certain Italian denomination I could mention.

WHAT TO BUY A MAD PRIESTWHO HAS EVERYTHING

2012-01-18T12:42:00.001Z

Although getting it through my front door
is going to be a bit of a problem.

Further details at NJ.COM.

A VERY IMPORTANT HAPPY BIRTHDAYPLUS CAPTION COMPETITION

2012-01-18T12:30:00.002Z

It is with great personal pleasure that I can announce to the world that today is OCICBW... veteran, and all round pain the ass, JCF's fiftieth birthday. How our friend survived so long without being strangled is amazing, bordering on the miraculous.

We all wish JCF the best of days and a long and happy future.

Here is JCF (looking, I must say, rather babelicious in this photo - gorgeous teeth) with hiking buddy, Coco. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to come up with a caption to place in Coco's thought bubble. JCF has incredibly broad shoulders and, furthermore, deserves everything that's coming to him (her/whatever). So, off you go, then!

JAN AND SUSAN TAKE IT TO THE IRISH

2012-01-18T12:10:00.000Z

Inveterate troublemaker (on the side of the angels), Jan Nunley, is stirring it again, this time in Ireland. In the Church of Ireland Gazette's special supplement on same-sex relationships, Jan and her missus, Susan, write:

"We confess to some impatience with the fact that for two adults of the same gender to bond and celebrate a lifelong commitment remains controversial, even shocking, in some quarters.

"Ours is a marriage every bit as spiritually rich, full, holy and deeply Christian as any opposite-gender marriage we know, and more than many." The couple also argue that there are better ways of serving God than "critiquing and condemning the shared lives of two middle-aged American women of faith on the grounds of isolated Bible verses dubiously parsed."

I think the true nature of the Church of Ireland's attitude towards gay people is summed up in this quotation from the editor's foreword:

"There then follow two articles, both approaching the subject from a spirituality and experiential perspective. The first is from an American Episcopalian lesbian couple, the Revd Jan Nunley and her partner, Susan Erdey. Then follows an essay by an abstaining gay man, who is a member of the Church of Ireland but, for reasons that are understandable, writes under a pseudonym, Marcel Sanchez."

Understandable? Maybe.

Acceptable? Not in any country that claims that it is civilised and enlightened and certainly not in an institution that aligns itself to the great releaser of captives, Jesus Christ.

DON'T ROCK THE BOAT, BABY!

2012-01-17T19:19:00.000Z

By Nelson Jones in THE NEW STATESMAN:

Whilst reading this I was reminded of an email I received last year from a friend who is in a position to know about such things...

"...the c of e, which to me has proven itself to be the most status-driven horrid culture of any of the ecclesial cultures I've encountered ( in the non fundamentalist world). All those pretty boys in lace and power shitting on those who are actually making a difference in people's lives locally."

Yep! That's my church. At least it was until they disappeared me.

I sort of see this as a love song between The Grand Tufti and JJ:

WORSHIP AT ST. LAIKA'S

2012-01-17T17:28:00.000Z

EVENING

PRAYER

BOOK OF

COMMON PRAYER

TUESDAY

17TH.

JANUARY

2012

THE FEAST OF

SAINT

ANTONY

OF EGYPT

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THE HAIR OF THE DOG

2012-01-16T23:11:00.000Z

From THE SUNDAY SUN:

The Brandling Villa in South Gosforth, Newcastle, is selling a special beer, made with beer ingredients of malt and hops and also meat extract, especially for dogs so that drinkers’ four-legged friends can enjoy a cheeky pint at the same time. And if their drinking makes them peckish, the pub has created a special canine menu with dog versions of human favourites, including a Sunday roast served with cat-flavoured gravy.

Thanks to Petty Witter for this one.

AN ADVERT THAT I LIKEALOT

2012-01-16T23:03:00.002Z

AH! SOUL

2012-01-16T22:58:00.001Z

From NEWS-PRESS:

Former nun, Judy Beaumont, is defying centuries-old doctrine in becoming the first woman in Southwest Florida to be ordained a Roman Catholic priest. Bishop Frank Dewane of the Diocese of Venice, has warned her not to cross that patriarchal line.

“It has been brought to my attention that you purportedly reside in the Diocese of Venice in Florida and may attempt to be ‘ordained’ to the ministerial priesthood here within this Diocese,” Dewane wrote in a letter to Beaumont. “This is a most grave and serious matter of consequence for your soul.”

The consequence is automatic excommunication, or expulsion from the church, the bishop wrote. The same penalty applies to anyone who participates in the ordination ceremony.

“With this in mind, for the good of your immortal soul, I exhort you to choose not to participate in this attempted ‘ordination,’” Dewane wrote.

Beaumont says she will follow her conscience and take the consequences.

COMMENT: My guess is that the good sister most definitely has a large and beautiful soul. Bishop Bully, on the other hand, probably has a a shrivelled up lump of pure hatred where his soul should be.

SPINNING FOR JESUS

2012-01-16T22:44:00.000Z

A popular Catholic priest known for his devotion to his parish and work with the homeless, was sentenced to three years and one month in prison on Friday, after he used parish funds for gambling. Monsignor Kevin McAuliffe, 59, who was parish priest at St Elizabeth Ann Seton Church in Las Vegas, Nevada, was convicted of taking $650,000 (£424,000) to support his gambling habit.

His defence lawyer, Margaret Stanish, said, "Some supporters see the potential for something good to come from the realization that their trusted spiritual leader also suffers from human frailty, a frailty that merits forgiveness in accordance with their religious beliefs."

The Rev. Kovalcin from the Catholic Diocese of Las Vegas stated, “He must repair the damage he has caused and heal the people he has hurt. He cannot do that from a prison confinement.”

DON'T BLAME MADPRIEST,BLAME THE NAUGHTY NUN

2012-01-15T23:22:00.001Z

A woman and a man are involved in a horrific collision, but amazingly both escape completely unhurt - though their cars are written off.

As they crawl out of the wreckage, the man sees the woman is blonde and strikingly beautiful. Then the woman turns to the man and gushes breathily: 'That's incredible - both our cars are demolished but we're fine. It must be a sign from God that we are meant to be together!'

Sensing a promise, the man stammers back, 'Oh yes, I agree with you completely!'

The woman goes on, 'And look, though my car was destroyed, this bottle of wine survived intact, too! It must be another sign. Let's drink to our love!'

'Well, OK!' says the man, going with the moment. She offers him the bottle, so he downs half of it and hands it back.

'Your turn,' he says.

'No, thanks,' says the woman, 'I think I'll just wait for the police.'

MADPRIEST'S THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

2012-01-15T23:17:00.002Z

In the non-evangelical parts of the Church of England the most vociferous opposition to gay equality comes from gay men and lesbians who believe being gay or a lesbian is a sin or are just jealous because they hid their sexuality and don't see why young people don't have to.

WORSHIP AT ST. LAIKA'S

2012-01-15T15:53:00.000Z

HOLY COMMUNION

SUNDAY

15TH. JANUARY 2012

SECOND SUNDAY

OF EPIPHANY

All are welcome to join me in taking communion.
There are no exceptions.

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THEY'RE BACK!

2012-01-15T01:53:00.000Z

JEFFREY FINDS HIS BALLS

2012-01-15T00:16:00.000Z

From THE MAIL:

The Very Rev Jeffrey John, Dean of St Albans, has instructed an eminent employment lawyer to complain to Church officials after being rejected for the role of Bishop of Southwark. Sources say the dean, one of the most contentious figures in the Church, believes he could sue officials under the Equality Act 2010, which bans discrimination on the grounds of sexuality.

COMMENT: I wonder if they'll try the same dirty tricks with Jeffrey John as the Bishop of Newcastle, Martin Wharton, successfully employed to frighten me into dropping my case against him for blatant disability discrimination. At least he won't be up against the officer in Newcastle Diocese who told a union rep that any priest who took them to court would never work in the Church of England again. Which, if my present situation is anything to go by, was the truth.

The hierarchy of the Church of England contains some of the biggest hypocrites that have ever lived. They say one thing in public and do the opposite behind closed doors. They get away with it because they believe that they are exempt from adhering to the law of the land when it comes to human rights issues. For the sake of the gospel, for the sake of the Church for goodness sake, this has to stop. Perhaps, just perhaps, Jeffrey John, who is a Christian known for his integrity and patience, will be the person who will get rid of this embarrassing corruption from the Church once and for all. One thing is for certain, a heck of a lot more of the general public will be on his side and not on the side of his persecutors. So if they win they will lose. The Church of England will be dead within a few years, it's membership will consist of a few geriatric spinsters and a handful of misogynist, fearfully closeted gay priests. Remember the last episode of "The Rev?" A prophecy is my guess.

ROMAN CATHOLIC CHURCHCLAIMS CHILD ABUSE RECORD

2012-01-13T17:32:00.002Z

A Roman Catholic priest in Germany has admitted to 280 counts of sexually abusing three boys over a several-year period. The 46-year-old priest, who has been suspended, went on trial Thursday at the state court in Braunschweig. The dapd news agency reported that he showed no remorse.

Ye gods! How are they going to spin this one?

THERE ARE NO FALSE PROPHETS IN ENGLAND

2012-01-13T17:09:00.000Z

At least, according to well-known Seattle idol worshipper, Mark Driscoll, there aren't. In the current edition of "Christianity Magazine" (that's just it's title which doesn't necessarily reflect the content of the rag), the man with the world's biggest inferiority complex, claims, "Let’s just say this: right now, name for me the one young, good Bible teacher that is known across Great Britain. You don’t have one – that’s the problem."

Well, praise the Lord! The last thing my green and pleasant land needs is to be infested with misogynist, homophobic, ageist, strutting throwbacks to Homo Erectus going around trying to recruit young men to the church by telling them they can disregard every advance in equality achieved in the last one hundred years. It's bad enough having to live down the homophobia and class snobbery of the Church of England without having "Sarah Palin in pants" making our embarrassment even worse.

WORSHIP AT ST. LAIKA'S

2012-01-13T12:44:00.000Z

EVENING
PRAYER

13TH. JANUARY 2012

FEAST OF

SAINT HILARY

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THE RETURN OF LOUD FRIDAY

2012-01-13T12:02:00.000Z

Band's MYSPACE page

MOSES ON DIVORCE

2012-01-13T09:40:00.001Z

From THE DAILY MAIL:

He is a senior Church of England cleric and Queen’s chaplain who has written guides to marital harmony. But the Reverend Canon Andrew Clitherow’s own affairs of the heart are causing quite a stir in his parish.

His congregation is in uproar and so is the local bishop. For Canon Clitherow, 60, is said to have assured the diocese there was no one else involved when he split from the second Mrs Clitherow last year. Now, less than a year later, the father of four has married Nicola Howard, 44. She has moved into the sprawling Georgian vicarage with him.

Canon Clitherow was first married to Elizabeth in 1982 and the couple have two children. He left her and married his second wife Rebekah in 2002, ten years after meeting her while she was still a pupil at Rossall public school, where he was working as a choirmaster and chaplain. They also had two children together and appeared to be blissfully happy. But he stunned the congregation at St Cuthbert’s Parish Church in Lytham St Annes last March when he admitted he and Rebekah had separated after nine years of marriage and were to divorce.

The Canon is no longer performing any church duties and is said to be on ‘sick leave’.

GRAND TUFTI GOES BACK TO SCHOOL

2012-01-13T09:16:00.000Z

From THE TELEGRAPH:

Dr Rowan Williams, 61, was questioned by Rowan Williams, 11, about his role as the most senior cleric in the Church of England during a school visit in Oxford. He was asked to explain why women are not allowed to be bishops, and replied: “It's pretty complicated but we are working on it.”

The Archbishop also told how he had enjoyed drama at school and there was a “short fantasy moment” when he thought about becoming an actor.

COMMENT: Well, if being an actor is about pretending to be someone you are not, in public, then at least one childhood dream has come true for the old boy.

MONKEY BUSINESS IN THE CHURCH OF ENGLAND

2012-01-13T08:18:00.000Z

A big thank you to Deacon Charlie Perrin for sending in this gem.

PATENTLY ABSURD

2012-01-12T14:38:00.005Z

The leaders of two of the world's major religions, Islam and Christianity, are in a state of shock today following the announcement that the government of Israel has taken out an international patent on the One, True God.

A statement, released today by the Knesset, claims that because Richard Dawkins sells more books than the Pope, it is now obvious that God does not exist. Therefore, the Israelis conclude, God is just an idea, an invented and imaginary concept and, most important of all as far as they are concerned, it is their invented and imaginary concept. Basically they are saying that the One, True God is their intellectual property in the same way that "The God Delusion" is Dawkins' intellectual property.

Although international courts are yet to rule on the legality of Israel's monopolisation of monotheism, the United Nations has issued a provisional injunction which forbids anybody, other than Jews, from making any reference to God in their services and literature. The New Testament and the Koran are now technically illegal and publication of either book without the permission of the Knesset will be regarded as a breach of copyright. Ownership of existing copies may well render the owner guilty of being an accomplish to the original crime of bootlegging or, at the very least, being in receipt of stolen goods. In an attempt to minimise the number of potential lawsuits the leader of Iran's Cloudy But Dry Muslims, Ayatollah Dinnerjacket, has contact Poppa Benny in Rome with the interesting suggestion, "We'll burn yours and you burn ours."

However, OCICBW...'s legal experts believe that, although Israel's ownership of the One, True God may be difficult to challenge successfully in court, this does not mean that Roman Catholics will have to stop worshipping the Virgin Mary or evangelicals, the yankee dollar. In fact, some church leaders are trying to spin this unexpected development as an opportunity rather than a problem. The Grand Tufti of the Church of England is personally quite excited as he hopes the removal of the Bible from bookshop shelves will lead to an increase in the sales of his own books. Taking a different tack the Presiding Tufti of the U.S. Episcopal Church is simply taking the view that any international patents or injunctions and, certainly, anything the UN decides, do not apply to her church because it's American.

THE MIDNIGHT JUKEBOX

2012-01-12T00:16:00.002Z

For a friend.

Ruth Etting (November 23, 1897 — September 24, 1978) was an American singing star and actress of the 1920s and 1930s, who had over 60 hit recordings and worked in stage, radio, and film. She is known as "America's Sweetheart of Song." (WIKIPEDIA)

TRACIE THE RED'S THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

2012-01-11T23:29:00.000Z

AND A SON WHO HAS MURDERED HIS BROTHER

2012-01-11T23:25:00.000Z

A friend of mine over on Facebook recommended that I watch this because I was obviously having trouble getting my head round Christian marriage. I'm so glad I did because I was obviously basing my remarks on the false doctrine that God is love and we should love one another. PTL Mrs Bowers was there to put me straight, so to speak.

CAPTION COMPETITION

2012-01-11T23:09:00.000Z

I think Georg Gänswein is thinking "I recognise that smile."

But I'm sure you can come up with loads more ideas.

So off you go then!

ATHEISM WILL EAT ITSELF

2012-01-11T13:12:00.003Z

Every time I state that there is no morality without an eternal reason for acting in a prescribed way I am attacked by various correspondents. As I have a perfectly logical reason for believing this to be true and, even though I have begged people to give me a logical reason why it should not be true, nobody ever has, I will continue to say that atheism can have no real morality attached to it. However, unreal as morality may or may not be our experiences of life, at least, feel real. When we are depressed we experience a feeling that we would prefer not to experience. The converse is true with happiness. Some physical experiences are enjoyable, whilst some physical experiences are painful. No matter what esoteric ideas we may have about the true nature of experience for all intents and purposes pleasure is good and pain is bad. Therefore, it is perfectly reasonable, in fact it is the only sensible course of of action, to maximise our pleasure and minimise our pain. If we do that for others then we can expect that others will do that for us and so we end up with a practical pseudo-morality for a godless world.

In such a godless world all claims that something is better than another thing must be backed up by utilitarian logic based on the pseudo-morality I proposed above. You cannot, for example, claim that we should not covet our neighbour's ox simply because that what it says in the Bible. However, you could claim that such covetousness is wrong because it may well lead to a loss of happiness for the owner of the ox.

If we follow this code of communal living, the value of specific truths are dependant on the consequences of making them public. Truth, in and of itself, has no value. It is neither good nor bad. Basically, we can believe whatever we like as long as it does not hurt anybody else. Therefore, if a scientist makes the statement that there is absolutely no evidence that a certain homeopathic remedy cures cancer but there is evidence that a certain drug cures cancer, that would be a good truth that should be accepted by all as it will lead cancer sufferers to seek the right treatment and be cured rather than taking the wrong treatment and die prematurely and painfully. But for a scientist to claim that the earth goes round the sun rather than the sun circling the earth may only be a matter of interest. Such a discovery may cause certain people pleasure but there is no reason, in a godless universe, to campaign against contrary views even if they are poppycock.

Religion is tied in with all sorts of rules and regulations, some of which are good (such as charity) and some of which are bad (such as the oppression of certain groups within society) according to my proposed atheistic morality. But, if you strip away all these encumbrances from religion you are left with basic beliefs that affect only the believer. For example, Christians believe in a loving God who created the universe. It would be a perverse thinker who regarded such a belief as a painful thing. In fact, overwhelmingly, scientific investigation has shown that believers in such concepts derive great happiness from their belief. Therefore, to work to disabuse such people of their beliefs would be to remove happiness from them and would be contrary to the pseudo-moral code of atheism. The claim that the non-existence of God is the truth means nothing in a meaningless universe, so why bother?

I am not saying that we should hide the truth or stop looking for truth. Scientific truth should be accesible to everybody. But, to deliberately set out to persuade believers that there is no god is, at best, pointless and, at worst, an evil thing to do if you believe that, even in a godless universe, we should seek to increase happiness and decrease suffering.

CELIBATE FORMER FASCIST SPEAKS OUT OF ARSE

2012-01-10T18:32:00.000Z

What I want to know is why a gay couple can trigger Armageddon but not a celibate priest. I mean, surely the issue (or rather the lack of issue) is exactly the same.

From REUTERS:

Pope Benedict said Monday that gay marriage was one of several threats to the traditional family that undermined "the future of humanity itself." He made some of his strongest comments against gay marriage in a new year address to the diplomatic corps accredited to the Vatican in which he touched on some economic and social issues facing the world today. He told diplomats from nearly 180 countries that the education of children needed proper "settings" and that "pride of place goes to the family, based on the marriage of a man and a woman."

"This is not a simple social convention, but rather the fundamental cell of every society. Consequently, policies which undermine the family threaten human dignity and the future of humanity itself," he said.

AND THE GOLDEN MADDIEFOR BEST FILM GOES TO...

2012-01-10T00:32:00.004Z

I saw this film on the big screen at the weekend.
Yes, it lives up to the hype.
Yes, the French do make bloody good films.
Yes, it is the movie event of the year.
Yes, Jean Dujardin is gorgeous throughout.
Yes, the music score is simply divine.
Yes, Uggie should win the Oscar for Best Actor this year.
Yes, we should start the rumour that John Goodman mouths "Mitt Romney is an evil fascist" during various key scenes in the movie.
Yes, you should all go see it.

THE MIDNIGHT JUKEBOXMAKE TIM HAPPY SPECIAL

2012-01-10T00:14:00.001Z

I received the following email earlier today:

No I hadn't. Yes, there is. And here it is. Loads of it. Enjoy.

My favourite is the last but one track,
"Little Pot Stove." I have no idea why.

Nicolas Paul "Nic" Jones was born on 9 January 1947 in Orpington, Kent. He first learned to play guitar as a young teenager. His interest in folk music was aroused by some old school friends who had formed a folk band called The Halliard. When the members of the group decided to turn professional, one of them left to pursue a different career and Nic was invited to take his place. Whilst playing with The Halliard, Jones learned to play the fiddle, and also how to research and arrange traditional material. The group toured the UK between 1964 and 1968, eventually splitting up when two of the members decided to pursue careers outside the folk music business.

Jones decided to pursue a career as a solo folk artist. He started playing professional gigs in 1969, and in 1970 released his first album. Between 1971 and 1980 Jones recorded four more solo albums. Apart from Jones' trademark vocals, fingerstyle guitar and fiddle, the records also introduced guest instrumentalists playing piano, harmonium, bodhran, melodeon and recorders.

During his career, Jones was much in demand as a session musician and he guested on albums by leading UK artists such as June Tabor, Shirley Collins, Barbara Dickson, Richard Thompson and many others. He was also a member of short-lived folk group "Bandoggs", comprising Jones, Tony Rose, Peter Coe and Chris Coe, and which released one album in 1978.

In February 1982 Jones was involved in a serious car accident while driving home after a gig at Glossop Folk Club. Jones' car ran into a lorry pulling out of "Whittlesea brickworks" on the road between Peterborough and March in Cambridgeshire. He suffered very serious injuries, including many broken bones and brain damage, and required intensive care treatment and hospitalisation for a total of eight months. Jones's injuries left him with permanent physical co-ordination problems and unable to play the guitar as well as before – he could also no longer play the fiddle at all. The accident effectively ended his career as a touring and recording professional musician.

On 5 August 2010, after an absence of 28 years, Jones made a return to the stage. He appeared at an event dedicated to his music at Sidmouth Folk Week. Jones sang three songs with one of his former bands Bandoggs and commented that he would "consider performing again – but wanted to sing his own songs." (WIKIPEDIA)

MADPRIEST'S THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

2012-01-09T20:12:00.001Z

In olden times bishops were sent out.

Nowadays they are seated.

PRAYER REQUEST

2012-01-09T20:10:00.001Z

Yo! international prayer warriors. Our good friend Tracie the Red's bloke, Joe, has a job interview on Wednesday morning. He's been mostly unemployed for the last four years.

The post is that of operations supervisor and, as you can see from the photo, he looks ideally suited for the job. I certainly wouldn't argue with him.

Add him to your prayer list. If Joe is successful it will make such a huge different to our two friends lives and their life together. It will also make a certain redhead very happy indeed and that can only be a huge win for all of us.

CREATIVE PEOPLE: HUMAN AND A RESOURCE

2012-01-09T10:48:00.003Z

A recurring theme in stories about (Duke) Ellington, it seems, was his talent for motivation and inspiration. But it was coupled with what the authors call "a laissez-faire attitude towards the behaviour of his musicians". He saw their foibles as the price to be paid for having access to their talents. For Ucbasaran that raises questions for entrepreneurs. "If you have a creative process, you have to have talented employees. But talent is not always easy to manage. To what extent do you accommodate wayward behaviour? You have to give them freedom and space, but direct them in subtle ways so that the end result comes together harmoniously."

The above is taken from an article entitled "Business and all that jazz" posted at THE GUARDIAN, which Paul(A) kindly sent in to me. It's very interesting and contains much that should be of interest to church leaders. Christian ministry attracts a high percentage of creative people to its ranks who need to be strong willed if they are to survive and do the job well. I cannot think of any major movement of renewal within the Church that has not been spearheaded by a creative person. Yet, it is also usual for the lovers of the status quo within the church, who tend to be the dominant personality type in the higher reaches of church hierarchies, to view creative people with a lot of suspicion and relate to them in an aggressive manner. They regard the creative as a danger to society, and the truth is, they most likely are. But, I suggest that this is a risk well worth taking. In fact, it is a necessary risk if the church is to thrive rather than stagnate.

Creative people are, in fact, quite easy to get on side. You see, they are like children constantly craving praise and respect from their parents. Because they rarely receive this from people "in authority over them" any manager who sincerely offers the creative person praise and respect will gain their loyalty and love. With such a relationship in place the manager will be in a good position to negotiate and seek compromise although they will have to accept that such may be given begrudgingly (creative people do have a reputation of anti-authoritarianism to maintain). Church managers who also show interest in the projects of the creative people in their charge and offer encouragement may be in for a bumpy ride but it will be a ride that may well end up at a destination that actually brings glory to the Church rather than the P.R. disaster the unimaginative fear the eccentric will always land on their laps.

Christian ministry, especially evangelism, has other similarities to jazz. The best evangelists have also always been great improvisors. We only have to read the writings of St. Paul to see that this is true. His "all things to all men" rap would be regarded as far too great a risk to most church leaders nowadays who desire everybody working for them to be created in their own image and most definitely not in the image of the people such workers are taking the gospel to.

The good news of Jesus Christ is exciting, unpredictable in its outworking and extremely malleable in the hands of any artist who is truly inspired by it. If Christian ministry was music it would be freeform and liberating not constraining, constantly repetitive and unchanging. It would be inspired not mechanical, analogue not digital, soulful not soulless. It would be all that jazz and more.

ARCHBISHOP BLABBERMOUTH

2012-01-09T09:29:00.001Z

From THE MAIL:

A new biography of the Queen reveals for the first time her despair over the divorce of Prince Charles and Princess Diana, and the Monarch’s fears that her eldest son was about to ‘throw everything away’. In "Elizabeth The Queen," by Sally Bedell Smith, the former Archbishop of Canterbury, Lord Carey, recalls the moment that the Queen finally confronted the problems in her son’s marriage. He reveals she was terrified that history was about to repeat itself – that Prince Charles would give up his place in the line of succession for Camilla, just as King Edward VIII gave up the throne in 1936 to marry his mistress, Wallis Simpson.

Lord Carey says: "There was a moment when we were talking very candidly about divorce. I remember her sighing and saying, 'History is repeating itself.' I saw despair. What she was talking about was the Duke and Duchess of Windsor. She was concerned that if they divorced, Charles would marry Camilla. She thought Charles was in danger of throwing everything out of the window by rejecting Diana and forging another relationship."

But Lord Carey advised the Queen that Prince Charles’s relationship with his wife was beyond repair. He says: "The personalities were so different. The Queen understood that. She could offer support and put them into her prayers."

COMMENT: Erm? Isn't there something about priests and confidentiality. Heck, surely it's required of any professional, especially those in caring occupations.

WHY DID JESUS GET HIMSELF BAPTISED?

2012-01-08T23:40:00.001Z

Jesus asked to be baptised so that he could make a public act of repentance for his sins.

What?! Are you saying Jesus wasn't without sin?!

Yes. The Word became flesh and it is absolutely impossible to be flesh without sinning. It's just the way the world is. Even if he managed to avoid all deliberate sins he would have been guilty of innumerable accidental (in the true meaning of the word) sins and a near infinite number of sins of omission.

You want Biblical proof?

Well, there was the incident in the Temple when he was twelve years old. Don't make excuses for the lad! What he put his parents through that week was "unforgivable."

You want conclusive proof?

When Jesus said "He who is without sin, cast the first stone," he didn't throw a rock at the woman, did he?!

THE SUNDAY OFFERING?

2012-01-08T13:04:00.000Z

The administrator of this site is the Reverend Jonathan Hagger (a.k.a. MadPriest). He is a Church of England priest but he receives no salary from any church or any other employer. At present his ministry consists entirely of his work at OCICBW...

However, he likes to eat occasionally and his blogs cost quite a bit of money to run. So, in true Anglican style a collection plate is being made available for your donations (via PayPal).

You will never be asked to pledge or tithe but a regular monthly contribution from you would give him security and peace of mind.
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WORSHIP AT ST. LAIKA'SHOLY COMMUNION WITH AN ACT OFTHANKSGIVING FOR HOLY BAPTISM

2012-01-08T13:01:00.000Z

All are welcome to join me in taking communion. There are no exceptions.

The order of service is posted beneath the audio file so that you can join in with the service. The words in bold type are the ones we say together.

If you want to physically partake in this service you will require a small piece of bread and a small amount of drink (preferably made from grapes and containing alcohol). You will also need a small dish of water for the act of thanksgiving for baptism. How you view the nature of these parts of the service is completely up to you.

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TITHING OPPRESSES THE POOR

2012-01-07T11:08:00.003Z

In a lengthy piece in my local newspaper this week, Justin Welby, the bishop of Durham, gave some suggestions for new year's resolutions. Right at the top of his list was the plea that we should all tithe 10% of our income. Respect due, he did not insist that the money should go to the Church but stated that any charity would be an appropriate recipient of our tithes. I fully agree with him that being charitable is a human duty. That humans give to others is empirical proof of our claim that we have the ability to empathise with others and so is part of what makes us human. Not to give to others makes us less than human. Where I disagree with him is with his insistence on charity being linked to a percentage of income.

Percentages of income no doubt seem perfectly logical to a person who has an income in excess of what they need to live on. However, to those who struggle to survive it is just another burden placed on them by the rich and privileged.

You see, the real value of a percent of something increases the smaller it is. A pensioner in England receiving £100 per week is living on the breadline. If she gives away 10% of that £100 she will be left with just £90 and the loss of £10 will make her life even more miserable and hard. A company executive earning £2000 per week will be enjoying a life with no financial worries and will have plenty of money to spend on luxuries. If he gives away 10% of his salary each week he will be left with £1800 and will still be enjoying a life with no financial worries and he will still have plenty of money to spend on luxuries. The pensioner will have made a huge sacrifice. The company executive will not have done.

Jesus threw out the tithing system and replaced it with the recommendation (warning) that, as long as there are people who do not have enough money to live on, we should give all our wealth in excess of what we need to live on to those who live in absolute poverty. Very few Christians follow this system of true tithing. We hope that Christ will be merciful when he returns to judge us. A rich person who demands that poor people should give more, in effect, than himself would be testing the Lord's mercy to the extreme. Instead, a rich person should secretly give a percentage of his income far in excess of the traditional tithe and never insist that anybody else gives anything. He should certainly not insist on others tithing a percentage as any taxation system based on a fixed percentage being demanded from all favours the rich and further oppresses the poor.

IT'S THAT TRACIE THE RED WOMAN AGAIN

2012-01-07T01:11:00.002Z

DON'T BLAME MADPRIEST,BLAME TRACIE THE RED

2012-01-06T12:47:00.000Z

A FACEBOOK CONVERSATION

2012-01-06T12:42:00.002Z

I received a message asking me to become friends with someone on Facebook. I said yes, of course. The person concerned immediately contacted me on my message board. This was the conversation.

It's a shame, but my correspondent will never read my last piece of good advice because within the 30 seconds it took me to write and send it she had unfriended me.

The truth might set some people free but there are an awful lot of people out there (especially within the evangelical wing of the Church) who are so scared stiff of even thinking about what may be true and what may be false that they bind themselves in chains of ignorance, preferring bondage to freedom.

WORSHIP AT ST. LAIKA'SMASS ON THE FEAST OF THE EPIPHANY

2012-01-06T09:20:00.001Z

All are welcome to join me in taking communion. There are no exceptions.

The order of service is posted beneath the audio file so that you can join in with the service. The words in bold type are the ones we say together.

Click on the arrow on the player to stream.

Download via the MP3 icon below the player.

Download podcast via iTUNES.

MP3 File

OH BUGGER! THAT'S CHRISTMAS OVER

2012-01-05T23:37:00.000Z

This will be absolutely the last Christmas record from me until next December. But I've chosen a real goodie. A brilliant, soulful performance from Frederick "Toots" Hibbert that's simply oozing with misery. Enjoy.

BLOG NOTICE

2012-01-05T23:17:00.000Z

My apologies.

I have switched comment moderation on for a while as we've had one particular troll being particularly vile recently. He not only tried to get under my skin over Henry but also attacked other commenters, and I won't have that.

I never thought I'd ever say this but thank God for Facebook. At least you can have a decent conversation there without having to worry about the socially deviant crashing the proceedings.

A BITTER SWEET PAIN

2012-01-05T15:52:00.002Z

Thank you.

Thank you to everybody who has sent in messages of sympathy over the last twenty four hours following the death of my good friend, Henry the Cat. I am extremely grateful for your concern and have been comforted by your words.

Henry was never a noisy cat and wasn't one to run around the house or play with toys. But my house seems unusually quiet today. The two Mad Dogs have even been quiet for a change. They didn't even tell me when the postman came this morning. But the atmosphere here is one of bitter sweet sadness at the loss of a friend rather than overwhelming grief. As far back as I can remember I have believed that God will not let anything which he has created disappear for ever, not people, not animals, not flowers and trees, not even rocks and stones, not anything. I believe that Christ will return and usher in the Kingdom of God where all that has ever been will be once again in the peaceable kingdom where the cat lies down with the mouse.

A POETIC TRIBUTE TO HENRY THE CAT

2012-01-04T18:14:00.001Z

TILL WE MEET AGAIN MY FRIEND

2012-01-04T16:38:00.001Z

REST IN PEACE

HENRY THE CAT

1st. April 1995 -
4th. January 2012

You never bit or
scratched a human.
You sat on laps.
You never got run over.
You were the perfect cat.
You were my friend
and will be once again
when all is made well.

MADPRIEST IS CRYING

2012-01-04T11:44:00.000Z

My cat, and best friend, Henry, is very poorly. He hasn't eaten for five days.

We spent all yesterday evening at the veterinary hospital. Blood tests aren't showing up anything obvious and physical examinations are drawing a blank as well.

Henry spent the night at the hospital and is now on a drip.

I fear I am about to lose my friend of nearly seventeen years because we simply cannot afford to do anything else. The man who made me redundant better hope that God is a dog person.

COMPETITION TIME

2012-01-04T00:09:00.001Z

This is a photograph of Grandmère Mimi causing trouble as usual. I've removed the original slogan as I hadn't a clue what it was about. It's your task to come up with a new slogan. And don't worry, Mimi has sworn never to leave another comment at OCICBW..., so she can't get you. I will, of course, accept anonymous entries from those of you who take the Voodoo thing seriously.

GONE UP TO HEAVEN INTWO THOUSAND ELEVENPART ONE

2012-01-03T18:37:00.001Z

GRADY CHAPMAN
1st. October 1929 -
4th. January 2011

Singer

Led Grady Chapman And The Suedes.
Was a member of The Robins.

"Don’t Blooper"
- Grady Chapman And The Suedes

BOBBY POE (THE POE KAT)
13th. April 1933 - 22nd. January 2011

Singer and Guitarist

"Rock And Roll Record Girl"
- Bobby Poe and The Poe Kats

TOMMY CRAIN
16th. January 1941
- 12th. January 2011

Guitarist and
Banjo Player

"The Devil Went Down To Georgia"
- The Charlie Daniels Band

GLADYS HORTON
30th. May 1945 - 26th. January 2011

Singer with The Marvelettes

"Please Mr. Postman" - The Marvelettes

STEVE MANCHA
25th. December 1945
- 8th. January 2011

Singer

As well as a solo career he worked with
100 Proof Aged In Soul, The Holidays,
The Jaywalkers and The 8th Day

"Keep The Faith" - Steve Mancha

MICK KARN
24th. July 1958 - 4th. January 2011

Sang and played bass, flute,
keyboards, saxophone and oboe
Member of Japan

"Life In Tokyo" - Japan

GERRY RAFFERTY
16th. April 1947 - 4th. January 2011

As well as a solo career he was a member
of The Mavericks, The Humblebums,
Stealers Wheel and The Fifth Column.

"Stuck In The Middle With You"
- Stealers Wheel

HARVEY JAMES
20th. September 1952 - 15th. January 2011

Guitarist

Member of The Party Boys
and Sherbet

"Howzat" - Sherbet

CHARLIE LOUVIN
7th. July 1927 - 26th. January 2011

Singer - Member of The Louvin Brothers

"Must You Throw Dirt In My Face"
- Charlie Louvin with George Jones

JILL HAWORTH
15th. August 1945
- 3rd. January 2011

Actress
She sang, "Cabaret" and "Don't Tell Mama" in the original cast of the Broadway musical "Cabaret."

"Cabaret" - Jill Haworth

OH MY GOD, I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!

2012-01-03T13:45:00.000Z

From THE LOCAL (Norway):

TV viewers in Norway were left laughing their posteriors off after a serious nightly news show inadvertently used an eye chart teeming with internet slang. The visual blunder accompanied a segment about eye treatment for senior citizens on Dagsrevyen, national broadcaster NRK's evening news programme.

Newsroom editor Solveig Tvedt conceded that she and her team hadn’t properly examined the chart before going to air.

FRENCH SCHOOLCHILDREN TO HAVEONLY SLIM CHANCE OF PASSING EXAMS

2012-01-03T13:39:00.001Z

From THE LOCAL (France):

Popular diet expert Pierre Dukan, whose books have sold millions around the world, has written an open letter to the future president of France with advice on how to curb the country's obesity problem.

One of Dukan's proposals is that pupils preparing for the Baccalaureat exam should be able to gain extra marks by sticking within a specified body mass index range.

The Baccalaureat is the end of school exam taken by most 18-year-olds in France.

FEMALE BURGLAR FEELSFULL WEIGHT OF THE LAW

2012-01-03T13:10:00.001Z

From THE LOCAL (Norway):

Per Bratteberg, who had recently retired after 37 years in the Norwegian police force, was awoken by his wife early on Wednesday morning when she heard strange sounds coming from the kitchen of their home in Mandal.

Leaving the bedroom to investigate, the 100-kilo ex-cop found a woman standing in the middle of the kitchen, having already helped herself to wine and cash.

“Wearing only my underpants, I broke into a run and pounced on the uninvited guest. She was pretty rabid, and tried everything to break free,” Bratteberg told local newspaper "Lindesnes Avis."

As the struggle brought the pair from the kitchen to the hall, the woman suddenly realized that their paths had crossed before. She began calling Bratteberg by his first name and even offered him a drop of cognac, which she assured him was her own.

When the police finally arrived at the scene, they found their one-time colleague sitting on the woman’s back in a state of near-total undress.

“They had a good laugh at the sight that greeted them,” said Bratteberg.

THE GRAND TUFTI'S NEW YEAR MESSAGEOR THATCHER FUCKED THE KIDS

2012-01-02T16:45:00.004Z

Quite a lot of the images we're likely to remember from the footage of the riots in the summer will be of young people out of control in the streets, walking off with looted property from shops, noisily confronting police and so on. It all feeds into the national habit of being suspicious and hostile when we see groups of youngsters on street corners or outside shops and bus shelters. We walk a bit more quickly and hope we can pass without some sort of confrontation.

The events of the summer were certainly horrific. They showed us a face of our society we don't like to think about – angry, destructive, lawless. But it's crucial to remember that what we saw on the streets in August was just one facet of a bigger and much more heartbreaking problem. The youngsters out on the streets may have looked like a big crowd, but they are a minority of their generation – the minority whose way of dealing with their frustrations was by way of random destructiveness and irresponsibility. Most people of their own age strongly shared the general feeling of dismay at this behaviour.

I've come to visit the charity Kids Company in London where today a lot of young people are joining together to pack food parcels for needy families in the neighbourhood. When you have a chance of talking to young people like this you really get a sense of how they feel about the society they're in and the challenges they face.

We have to ask, what kind of society is it that lets down so many of its young people? That doesn't provide enough good role models and drives youngsters further into unhappiness and anxiety by only showing them suspicion and negativity. When you see the gifts they can offer, the energy that can be released when they feel safe and loved, you see what a tragedy we so often allow to happen. Look at the work done by groups like the Children's Society or by the astonishing network of Kids Company here in London, and you see what can be done to wake up that energy and let it flourish for everyone's good.

One of the unique things in the Christian faith, one of its great contributions to our moral vision, is the way it has spoken about children and young people. Whether it's Jesus blessing children, or St Paul encouraging a young church leader, saying, 'Don't let people look down on you because you're young', or St Benedict in his rule for monks saying that you need to pay attention to the youngest as well as the oldest – Christian faith has underlined the essential importance of giving young people the respect they deserve.

Of course they're not infallible; of course they have a lot to learn. So do we all. But being grown-up doesn't mean forgetting about the young. And a good New Year's Resolution might be to think what you can do locally to support facilities for young people, to support opportunities for counselling and learning and enjoyment in a safe environment. And above all, perhaps we should just be asking how we make friends with our younger fellow citizens – for the sake of our happiness as well as theirs. A very happy and blessed New Year to you all.

Yes. But.

The problem is that what Rowan Williams sincerely suggests (suggestions that have come out of the mouths of canvassing politicians many, many times in the past) is just treating the symptoms, not curing the illness. Respecting, encouraging and keeping occupied young people who are either unemployed or taken advantage of by employers, who have no money and, therefore, no dignity or hope for a "traditional" future, is no more effective in the long run as sucking a cough sweet when you are suffering from bronchitis.

Children and young adults are primarily influenced by three factors: family, peers and society and the greatest of these is society for the simple reason that society influences their families and peers as well as being a direct influence - the influence of society on a young person is a triple whammy.

There have always been, and will always be, good and bad parents with most parents aspiring to an acceptable average. Rich kids, sent off to boarding school and looked after by nannies, are just as abused as latch key poor kids. Working parents with little cash can be much better parents than a Hooray Henry who even farms out his sons and heirs during the school holidays. And, conversely, many rich parents do a better job of raising their spoiled brats than crackhead single moms and absent fathers.

Young people are always influenced by friends and youth culture. Although a caring family background where morality is well defined usually enables a young person to avoid going completely off the rails, there will always be children of the most loving, responsible parents who end up as junkies.

However, bad parents and the wrong sort of friends will always be the exception to the general rule if society doesn't work against the common decency which is inherent in the vast majority of us. And, yes, it is inherent as recent experiments involving toddlers have proved. We are born knowing the difference between right and wrong. Unfortunately we are also born with a tendency for self-interest and, so, growing up is about learning to balance these two human traits.

The shit hits the fan when society becomes either predominantly immoral or amoral. We are all part of society. We are all influenced by it and we all contribute to its current nature. But some people have more influence than others. England became the sociopathic society it is today because of one person, Margaret Thatcher. Backed by her army of bobbies and her yes ma'am, poodle cabinet, she spouted out her Darwinian venom from 10 Downing Street, preaching dog eat dog, survival of the fittest, amoralism in a bid to turn Britain into Little America but without opportunity for all. She laid the rotten egg that was to give birth to the boom and bust, bail out the bankers, economy that is taking us all to hell in a handcart right now. Worst of all she gave employers permission to stop treating their workers as people and, instead, view them in the same way they would view a disposable asset. She changed the employment laws to make this possible. It was at this point that England stopped being a Christian country and became a machine without morality. Ironically, it was the young who jumped on her bandwagon from hell. The tragedy is that it is now the young who have no hope because of Thatcher's destruction of society.

Thatcher got rid of the concept of job security, a job for life, that had been part of English self-mythology for much of the Twentieth Century. This created an underclass of long term unemployed, poor people, many of whom did anything legal and illegal to stay alive or found temporary relief in promiscuous sex, drugs and drink. And these people started treating each other in the way employers treated them, as expendable. Couples split up as quickly and easily as companies downsized and sold off assets. There is no moral compass in England today because Thatcher brought her jackboots down on it and smashed it to smithereens.

It is the children and grandchildren of the working people Thatcher screwed who rioted in our streets last year. They are the young people joining gangs and killing each other. They are the drug takers and drug pushers. They are the thieves steeling lead of church roofs and mugging each other for cell phones. And why shouldn't they? We live now in a post-Thatcherism cesspit of of personal greed fed by new-atheists telling us that we are machines programmed with selfish genes. These young people have seen first hand that there is absolutely no point in being part of society because, as Thatcher said, there is now no such thing as society. There is no point saving for the future because when they throw you on the scrapheap the first thing they take off you is your savings. You might as well spend every penny you earn as soon as it hits your bank account and enjoy yourself now so at least you have some happy memories to look back on when you are queuing up outside the job-centre waiting for some patronising git of a civil servant to quiz you about how hard you looked for a job in the passed week.

No, respecting the young is not good enough. If we do not start respecting their parents and grandparents; if we don't start providing security of employment and decent wages for working people, if we don't stop rewarding the parasites and start rewarding the people whose sweat fuels the economy, then young people will just laugh in our faces because they are not stupid and they can see from what happened to their parents that there is no such thing as respect in our society anymore and no God-bothering, over-privileged schoolteacher, who would stab his best friend in the back and who obviously disrespects the whatever percent of our population who were born gay, is going to persuade them otherwise.

Oh, happy new year, by the way.

HEADLINE OF THE DAY

2012-01-01T16:31:00.002Z

Then they should stop appointing decrepit, old men as popes.

MADPRIEST'S THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

2012-01-01T16:29:00.002Z

Jesus was a very aggressive pacifist.

WORSHIP AT ST. LAIKA'S

2012-01-01T16:12:00.000Z

HOLY

COMMUNION

SUNDAY

1ST. JANUARY, 2012

NEW YEAR'S DAY

All are welcome to join me in taking communion. There are no exceptions.

The order of service is posted beneath the audio file so that you can join in with the service. The words in bold type are the ones we say together.

If you want to physically partake of communion you will require a small piece of bread and a small amount of drink (preferably made from grapes and containing alcohol). You eat the bread after I say “The body of Christ,” and drink the wine after I say “The blood of Christ.” How you view the nature of this part of the service is completely up to you.

Click on the arrow on the player to stream.

Download via the MP3 icon below the player.

Download podcast via iTUNES.

MP3 File

MADPRIEST'S THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

2011-12-31T12:10:00.002Z

If I have a go at a Christian who is persecuting gay people, I am a hero. If I have a go at a Muslim who is persecuting Christians, I am unfriended. If I have a go at a reactionary Christian for failing in their Christian duty, I am applauded. If I have a go at a liberal Christian for the same, I am unfriended.

THE ANNUAL UNHOLY DUST-UP BUST-UP

2011-12-30T14:34:00.002Z

DON'T BLAME MADPRIEST, BLAME MAD DAD

2011-12-30T12:05:00.000Z

A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two drops of water. As the bartender gives her the drink she says, 'I'm on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday and it's today.'

The bartender says, 'Well, since it's your birthday, I'll buy you a drink. In fact, this one is on me.'

As the woman finishes her drink, the woman to her right says, 'I would like to buy you a drink, too.'

The old woman says, 'Thank you. Bartender, I want a Scotch with two drops of water.'

'Coming up,' says the bartender

As she finishes that drink, the man to her left says, 'I would like to buy you one, too.'

The old woman says, 'Thank you. Bartender, I want another Scotch with two drops of water.'

'Coming right up,' the bartender says.

As he gives her the drink, he says, 'Ma'am, I'm dying of curiosity. Why the Scotch with only two drops of water?'

The old woman replies, 'Sonny, when you're my age, you've learned how to hold your liquor. Holding your water, however, is a whole other issue.'

WE ARE HOLY BUT NOT ONE OF US IS INNOCENT

2011-12-28T12:28:00.002Z

The story of the slaughter of the Holy Innocents not only tells of the cruelty we humans are capable of it also makes the point that the mission of Jesus Christ would be a shared mission. Yes, Jesus suffered and died, but he did not do so alone. From the very beginning of our redemption ordinary human beings would be caught up, often without their consent, in both the joy (Christmas) and the pain (Holy Innocents) of Christ's work. This is still the case. Throughout the world today Christians are suffering because of their faith and its proclamation - from the losing of employment to imprisonment and, far too often, death.

There are many Herods in our world today, there always have been and, no doubt, there always will be until Christ returns to bring in the Kingdom of God. But we should be wary of judgementally demonising the Herod of the Bible. Each time we spend or vote selfishly we are no better than he was.

Every four seconds a child dies because of poverty, hunger, easily preventable diseases and illnesses, and other related causes. Around 7600000 holy innocents each and every year and the number is growing. On top of this, in the last decade, at least two million children have died in acts of warfare.

We could stop this obscene carnage. But we don't.

We are all Herods.

OH BUGGER! SO THAT WAS CHRISTMAS

2011-12-28T01:28:00.000Z

This is actually rather brilliant.

US CARDINAL PUBLICLY STATES THATKU KLUX KLAN GOT ONE THING RIGHT

2011-12-27T23:57:00.003Z

MADPRIEST'S THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

2011-12-27T20:25:00.002Z

The Episcopal Church of Sudan's retraction of their invitation to the presiding bishop of the Episcopal Church in the USA is like the Jew set upon by robbers, upon his recovery, telling the good Samaritan to fuck off because he worships the same God in a different way.

EPISCOPAL CHURCH OF SUDAN DISTANCESITSELF FROM CHRISTIAN RELIGION

2011-12-27T15:18:00.001Z

This sums up the spiritual priorities of so much of the Church in Africa:

In its December 15 letter to Jefferts Schori, the Episcopal Church of Sudan stated: "We acknowledge your personal efforts to spearhead prayer and support campaigns on behalf of the ECS and remain very grateful for this attention you and your church have paid to Sudan and South Sudan. However, it remains difficult for us to invite you when elements of your church continue to flagrantly disregard biblical teaching on human sexuality."

Not only is this in itself unbiblical and downright unchristian to the extreme, it is also rude. I wonder how many gay Episcopalians contributed their hard earned cash to the refugee relief effort when Northern Sudan was kicking the living daylights out of our biblically based brothers and sisters in Southern Sudan.

GENOCIDE BY ANY OTHER NAME

2011-12-27T12:33:00.003Z

The Armenian Genocide, also known as the Armenian Holocaust, the Armenian Massacres and, by Armenians, as the Great Crime, was the deliberate and systematic destruction of the Armenian population of the Ottoman Empire during and just after World War I. It was implemented through wholesale massacres and deportations, with the deportations consisting of forced marches under conditions designed to lead to the death of the deportees. The total number of resulting Armenian deaths is generally held to have been between 1 million and 1.5 million. Other ethnic groups were similarly attacked by the Ottoman Empire during this period, including Assyrians and Greeks, and some scholars consider those events to be part of the same policy of extermination.

The starting date of the genocide is conventionally held to be April 24, 1915, the day when Ottoman authorities arrested some 250 Armenian intellectuals and community leaders in Constantinople. Thereafter, the Ottoman military uprooted Armenians from their homes and forced them to march for hundreds of miles, depriving them of food and water, to the desert of what is now Syria. Massacres were indiscriminate of age or gender, with rape and other sexual abuse commonplace. The majority of Armenian diaspora communities were founded as a result of the Armenian genocide. (WIKIPEDIA)

It was a political act informed by the ideology of a perverted Islam in the same way the Nazi genocide against the Jews was a political act informed by the ideology of a perverted Christianity/paganism.

It was the first modern genocide, in fact the term was coined to describe it. Yet the Armenian people have never had their suffering truly acknowledged by the world community because both Turkey and Israel have a policy of vehemently denying that an act of genocide took place (Turkey, as the successor of the Ottoman Empire, for obvious reasons and Israel, because they do not want the word "genocide" to describe anything other than the Holocaust as they feel it would lessen the uniqueness of their suffering as far as the rest of the world is concerned). On the whole, other countries have selfishly kept very quiet about the atrocity for strategic, military and diplomatic reasons. Turkey has been a very useful ally of western governments since the birth of the state of Israel and, traditionally, western governments are fearful of upsetting the Israeli government. They are, of course, applying the same double standards here as they are currently applying in their relationships with human rights ignoring China.

I applaud the French government's recent decision to join nineteen other nations in officially recognising the Armenian Genocide. But it is not enough. In fact, no piecemeal recognition of the atrocity will ever be enough. What is more it is an abhorrence that the Armenian people have had to wait nearly a hundred years for healing. To make them wait for the nations of the world to one by one recognise the true nature of their suffering just adds to this obscene miscarriage of justice.

What is needed is the setting up of a commission by the International Criminal Court tasked to decide on whether or not the massacre of Armenians was an act of genocide. The commission should consist of atheists from countries not closely aligned to Turkey or Israel or predominantly Christian, Islamic or Jewish in their religion. It is extremely unlikely that any such commission would have any official status or gain worldwide recognition. But the decision of such a commission would be used by many democratic countries as a reason for them to officially concur with the findings of the commission.

And for the sake of the Armenian people and for the sake of world peace I hope that, in this case, a spade is most definitely called a spade. It is important for the Armenian people that the genocide committed against them by the Ottoman Empire is universally condemned in the same way that the Holocaust was condemned by, at least, the democratic countries of the world. It is also important that the Islamic world should be told unequivocally that their religion has been hijacked and corrupted to validate acts of supreme terror against Christians, and not that long ago. The common belief among Muslims that only they have sufficient cause for grievance gets in the way of any true reconciliation between Islam, Christianity and Judaism. It will not be until we have all publicly accepted the atrocities most of our nations have committed in the past including, most of all, the atrocities committed by our own countries, that there can be any movement towards a more peaceable world.

And for goodness sake, Israel! Letting people suffer by arguing over who has suffered the most is the most absurd stupidity there can be. Stop it!

THE PRAYER LIST: 27TH. DECEMBER 2011

2011-12-27T10:16:00.000Z

THANKSGIVING:

It must have been a truly joyous Christmas in the It's Margaret household this year. Our friend, who has been living with the uncertainty and anxiety that accompanies unemployment for many months following a painful separation from her previous church job, received, just days before, the wonderful news that she had been chosen by a new parish to be their priest. And what a brilliant and different parish it is too! The following was posted on her blog, LEAVE IT LAY WHERE JESUS FLANG IT, on the twentieth of December:

As soon as we are able, we will move, and I will begin the work of Priest for the Episcopal Mission on the Cheyenne River Reservation, South Dakota, home to Cheyenne River Sioux Tribe, bands of Mnicoujou, Siha Sapa, Oohenumpa, and Itazipco peoples. There are six churches and more "stations" in an area approximately the size of Connecticut.

We will live in Eagle Butte, on the Reservation, in the rectory of St. John's and I will be a circuit rider to the other worship places, sometimes doing up to three or maybe more services on a Sunday --gathering with the people of Emmanuel in White Horse, --Ascension, Blackfoot and St. Peter's Thunder Butte --to give thanks to God and share bread and wine.

Well done, Margaret and thanks be to God!

***

From THE MIRROR:

The Duke of Edinburgh will leave hospital this morning following his heart scare. He will be rejoining the Queen and other members of the royal family at Sandringham.

FOR YOUR PRAYERS:

On Christmas Eve, Moose, the five year old, black labrador who lives with Tim of the LIFE IS FULL OF SURPRISES... blog, was taken ill and rushed to the emergency room at his local animal hospital. Tim has not yet posted an update and so we really do pray that all is now well with Moose or, at the least, he is making a speedy recovery.

***

Do remember in your prayers the people of the Christchurch, New Zealand, and the surrounding area, whose Christmas was marred by the continuation of seismic activity in the region. Susan, at LETTERS FROM A MALVERN VICARAGE writes:

Following the four major aftershocks on 23 December, 5.8, 5.3, 6.0, 5.0, there is more damage to buildings and homes, more silt pushed up through the surface by liquefaction, more weary and worn out people, and more amazing work done by ordinary folk helping one another out.

***

From THE TELEGRAPH:

Iranian, Sakineh Mohammadi Ashtiani, who was sentenced to be stoned for alleged adultery in 2006 had her sentence suspended last year after an international outcry. However, under a judicial review being carried out she still could be hanged.

"There is no rush ... our Islamic experts are reviewing Ashtiani's sentence to see whether we can carry out the execution of a person sentenced to stoning by hanging," said Malek Ajdar Sharifi, head of judiciary in the East Azerbaijan province.

From CHRISTIAN TODAY:

There are unconfirmed reports that an Iranian pastor sentenced to death for apostasy may have to spend another year in prison. The case of Pastor Yousef Nadarkhani has twice been referred to the Supreme Leader of Iran, who has yet to issue a decision.

Christian Solidarity Worldwide said that a final ruling is expected at anytime and that it had received unconfirmed reports indicating that execution may be delayed for up to a year to allow time to convince the pastor to renounce his faith.

We pray for all people, muslim and non-muslim, who are suffering at this time due to cruel and unjust interpretations of the Islamic faith.

***

From AFP:

A Chinese court said Monday it had jailed veteran activist Chen Xi for 10 years for subversion, one of the longest sentences yet to be handed down in this year's crackdown on dissent. The court in the southwestern province of Guizhou convicted Chen, who was involved in the 1989 Tiananmen democracy protest movement, after a trial lasting just a few hours.

Activists believe the charge was related to essays the 57-year-old had written on advancing political reform and improving human rights in China.

We pray for an end to the human rights abuses inflicted on the Chinese people by their government and that the rest of the world stops being so bloody greedy, cowardly and self-serving and desists from turning a blind eye to the suffering of Chinese dissidents.

***

From THE BBC:

Almost 1,500 people are now known to have died in flash floods that struck the southern Philippines more than a week ago. Officials say more bodies had been found in the waters south of the island of Mindanao. It is not clear how many people are still missing but officials say the search for bodies will continue.

***

From THE HERALD:

Scotland is to take another storm battering tomorrow, with more gale-force winds and heavy rain bringing severe disruption to most of the country. The Met Office has issued a severe weather warning, saying the Central Belt will be hit by gusts of up to 80mph and that transport links such as the Forth Road Bridge and the Erskine Bridge could be affected. The warning comes after 101mph winds were recorded in Shetland early yesterday and severe conditions in much of northern Scotland left thousands without power.

If you would like to light
a candle as part of your
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then click on BEGIN and
follow the instructions.

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please type this into
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when requested.

FROM MY FACEBOOK MATE, HAROLD

2011-12-26T17:22:00.002Z

THE DAY AFTER - DUTY BECKONS

2011-12-26T16:39:00.003Z